By | August 7, 2013
Sharing a place with a roommate can give you some of the best things in life, and it can be rewarding that can provide you with memories that can last for a long time. Whether rooming with someone will form part of your college life or as a way to jumpstart your professional life, having a roommate will give you a number of life lessons and experiences that cannot be earned in college or in any kind of job. With your roommate, you can discover a friend and learn more about different things and culture.
However, just like other relationships and arrangements, rooming with someone can also offer you with lots of challenges. Roommate conflicts are inevitable, and it is best that you should be ready for this. Even at the start of the rooming experience all is well between you and your new roommate, keep in mind that life will soon turn sour. Remember, the both of you come from different backgrounds and with different persuasions thus roommate conflicts will form part of the experience.
Conflict Happens When You Are Rooming Together
Sooner or later, conflict will happen. But remember, this is a natural occurrence when it comes to relationships and sharing a room with another person. The reason of bad roommate relationships may vary– it can be about petty things or can grow into serious issues. For example, you may feel upset regarding your roommate’s attitude towards clutter, or you may feel that your personal rights and privacy are violated. Whatever the source of conflict is, it is important that this is immediately addressed.
Learn How to Diffuse First the Conflict (and Difficult Situation)
If you are facing an inevitable conflict, then it’s recommended that you address it calmly. It is never a good step to attack it in an angry manner. It is best that you approach the problem and talk to your roommate when you are already calmer. Here are some tricks to keep in mind and to keep you grounded when you learn how to solve roommate conflicts.
- Breathe and approach the subject in a calmer manner
- Control your speaking voice, and deliver your side in a slow and soft manner
- Respect the side of others while trying to state your side
- Learn to admit mistakes if you are wrong
- Choose the best time and place to thresh out the problem
- Try to talk in private, and never involve other people
Other Tips to Keep In Mind
Always speak using the ‘I’ statements to show ownership and to share your feelings and thoughts. This will not put the other party on a defensive position, and will ensure that your complaints will be heard. Also, try to level with the person. Make sure that you tell the other person that you understand his situation and you are willing to help.
Roommate conflicts are not contests- it’s all about building a compromise. It is best to find a common ground where you can talk and settle differences.